go forward by guide

rollercoaster.

we get on—for thrill & for fun—& all we know is we’re sitting down, strapping in, in for the ride. then, as we’re uplifted, we drop, fly, roar! wherever the tracks guide. we’re completely out of control, all we can do is sit, go with the flow, & laugh.

isn’t this true—life in God is a little like a rollercoaster. whooosh! we’re going forward in Him, by trust & rest, & it is fun. Joy. Freedom! we don’t have to figure it out. we just need to trust. The Life Engineer made the thing, & on Him we depend!

we only need Oil for the track & no fear. but if our roller coaster car gets stuck in the muck of afraid, we must get oil—by going to Secret Place, where Abba Father Friend will strengthen us, again.

so go.

Trust.

Fly! Free.

The Guide has a plan. sit down in Him. hold fast, buckle. Rest.

& don’t forget to smile.

touch my ugly

touch my ugly

let Your love light up my coffin

be with me & the cobwebs

 wisp away, my heart remembers

its song

again

& everything new—

from my piano key toes

 to garden brain.

I want to walk with You in the

cool of the day, going forward

together

that’s all I desire:

together.

have my ugly. I let

You in—to my basement

of dark & spiders & dust

fix me. find me.

only You can

make it better

the pain like cabooses crushing

my chest

yet normal

because it’s all i’ve known

yet You

yet, You

touch my ugly

wash my wounds

i’m ready

100% seen

all the way

known

I welcome

You

I’m done

hiding

behind my leaf loin

 cloth

find me

have me

i’m Yours

FUN 🎉

tummy blender hill bender hair dryer screaming higher, rollercoaster adrenaline. black & white abc’s absorb tea steam bathes in afternoon sunlight cat on lap, book lover dream. tall friends of brown & green lead eyes up with their branches waving in breeze fresh air canyon view flowerswild & sparkly dew, hikers paradise. board game night camaraderie around the table laugh till snort, pee—the gang’s all here. travel high flying jet to new everything exotic cuisine like cuy bright geometric patterned shawl funky music hola que tal? adventure junkie delight.

what’s your idea of fun?

have you thought of the Presence of God, as fun?

the bible says in psalm 16 that in His presence is fullness of joy. better than the most desirable & enjoyable thing imaginable, is Jesus.

God is fun.

He wants to have fun with us.

have you ever spent more than a half hour around a young child? If so you’ll know their world is quite different from ours! Their world revolves around laughter & play. Good Dads love to wrestle with their children, chase them & be the tickle monster, make blanket forts, & pretend.

a childs entire existence can be summed up into the word FUN.

so if we’re the children of God, we are waking up to playing with our Dad.

He rescues us because He delights in us (psalm 18:19)!

 “Yahweh your God is in your midst, A mighty one who will save. He will be joyful over you with gladness; He will be quiet in His love; He will rejoice over you with joyful singing.”

Zephaniah 3:17

“in the wilderness you saw how Yahweh your God carried you, just as a man carries his son, in all the way which you have walked until you came to this place.’”

Deuteronomy 1:31

“But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.”

John 1:12-13

“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice!”

Philippians 4:4

He loves to play with His kids. when we’re resting, we’re enjoying Jesus. when we’re enjoying Jesus, we’re resting. there is rest available today. it’s in the eyes of love. in the arms that carry you & the laughter—oh it’s in the laughter!

enjoy Jesus today, as Jesus enjoys you

free happy

clown. forced, fake, makeup caked, dressed to make you think of joy but on the inside a crying mess. farce!

—that’s all earth offers—pretend mirage happy like chasing wind, never full.

 All earth can give you is empty wind.

 “Vanity of vanities, says the Preacher, vanity of vanities! All is vanity. What does man gain by all the toil at which he toils under the sun? A generation goes, and a generation comes, but the earth remains forever. The sun rises, and the sun goes down, and hastens to the place where it rises. The wind blows to the south and goes around to the north; around and around goes the wind, and on its circuits the wind returns. All streams run to the sea, but the sea is not full; to the place where the streams flow, there they flow again. All things are full of weariness; a man cannot utter it; the eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear filled with hearing. What has been is what will be, and what has been done is what will be done, and there is nothing new under the sun.”

Ecclesiastes 1:2-9 ESV

but this lie that can lead us to look for who is life!

because happy is real.    

genuine in out true happy. rainbow on rain joy! real happy.

a snail snails slowly along, happy as can be just the way he is—slime trail & all! no rock complains about sitting still. no cloud compares herself to lightning in jealous huffs. no, nature, creation, is content. so why do we talk back to Creator? why do we wish away what He gave? each one of us has a gift unique! if we would only stop looking around & instead find & embrace our specific dna. rock rock and cloud cloud, salamander be salamander and naked mole rat be naked & you be nakedly unashamed in Him.

a part of losing ourselves in Him is to discover the freedom of being happy. happy with how He made us because we are satisfied with His beauty. happy is not a circumstance or luck, chance or getting what we want. happy is Jesus, the only love and puzzle piece missing cornerstone without whom we will always miss but with Him, fullness and happy and life!

Jesus + Nothing = Everything!

Jesus says love your neighbor as you love yourself. if you grumble about any part of how you’re made, you’re unable to love your neighbor in that way…

you cannot give what you don’t have.

so receive love, put it on! & you will have ample love to give to the person in front of your face this moment, & the next.

because without love we are nothing.

we can do no thing on our own.

so receive love now. put Him on. because He gave, we give.

happy & free because Jesus died for me, i’ll live for Him in harmony! paid the price, came back to life, free. bought with blood, sealed with dove. I know i’m loved. so I sit in this rapturous goodness & grace, getting to multiply what He first gave me—love.

I looked high low, under stones & stars, all the places I could think but my heart still throbbing my hole still gaping, invisible flesh wound spreading & sin sickness killing.

until what I could not do myself was done for me, chosen by God on a wet cold skull hill, Love came down & rescued me. drowning was all I knew until I received the gift of lungs and took my first breath of Life.

happiness is Jesus is Gods gift to us. to be fully content in God. whatever you think you’re looking for, the answer is Jesus. until you surrender to His breath in your lungs, you will be stuck with the mickey mouse bandaid you taped across the bullet holes bleeding out.

be happy now when you fall down, lose your clowns—those lies masquerading as truth, & let Happiness Himself wreck & give and burn prune remodel your interior until it’s new. because until we unglue, we’ll never be who we’re created to be. so let Artist great have you. & the masterpiece He crafted you to shine will be.

“You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”Psalm 16:11

“Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!”
Philippians 4:4

Singsong dancewed

the tree is laughing

all my hurt swallowed by music

i can’t stop singing

these battle wounds now

battle scars, marks

who testify—rebirth occurs

can’t tie me down

can’t cage these cells

the Breath Beginner

freed me

the Greenblue Marble Speaker spoke & stonecold death broke

flesh tent coursing, can’t contain, shaking

from fullness gonna overflow everywhere i go

my feet tap to His happy clap, their soles painted glee leave prints in minds & sidewalk squares. a simple song—Be Free

now a wave, now another, gush, asking to have me

yes! i say

thank you for proposing

my rainbow white gown drenched in joy watercolor tears. have me, ocean of bottomless sideless topless endless love

consume & partake

salsa bachata waltz twirl, love at first brush stroke You spoke & i am

You holy, divine, outside of time. all of life a mysterious romance—Your Kingly Self pursues clay us, poised to pounce the moment a flutter of one toe momentum moves toward Maker

waterfalls who no one sees

still relentlessly pour, in wood crevices and mountain treasure chests

come rest in the Garden of Design

lay down your time

surrender all bruises

put down those fists

you’ve been running but there’s a dance floor you’ve been boxing but He’s not keeping score

of your punches (that’s already paid for) so lay down and let the flower’s dew change you